Time flies...

1.5 weeks more to September. It'll mark about 2.5months of break up with him. 1.5 months more to my birthday. Officially late-twenties soon. This is exactly what I said when I was praying, "No, I'm not anxious about not getting married (trying to tell myself that I still have stuff to settle)." After thinking for sometime, I changed my lines, "ok, You win. Sorry I lied and I'm anxious about it."

When I look at most couples, seriously, no one is prepared. I guess the deaconess I spoke to yesterday is really true! The more we are unsure about it, the more we rely on God. If we are sure, we will do it based on our understanding and not His, and things will still turn out bad based on our understanding because we did not rely on God. Even if we did the same things a thousand times, not relying on God will result in failure now or in future. Somehow or rather, I just feel incomplete on my own with God. I could feel that there's more to come, but it's not going to happen now.

I'm doing my best to talk to God like a friend and also praying aloud. Encouraged by the deaconess in taking baby steps - pray one line first.  She also advised me to pray loudly so that we don't get distracted and that it's ok to pray without closing eyes or when you are doing other things. Also, it's ok to talk to God by not praying (example saying the closing) which I do that all the time.

Anyway, back to the time topic. I guess serious timetable is necessary but I do nt have the time to do the timetable! Tomorrow is the china boy. I guess I'll have to teach P1 first. So that he can complete P2 by the end of two months. His is easier la. I've gotten one who went through AEIS and managed to go to Haig Girls' School. God's grace la, because the girl is from Philippines and she's entering P4 or P3 if I'm not wrong. At that time I did panick because I was given only a month to teach her and help her obtain good grades so that she can go to a good school. Now I'm given another nationality and it poses a new challenge to me. More speed less haste. So relax and teach.

Alright, now is really late.