Was so tired from the railway trekking and the planning of the notice board that it has totally taken a toll on me. Group leaders are not exactly responding. I'm so glad that the board turns out well! I realized that I really enjoy doing publicity for the YAF and if God is willing, I don't mind doing it till I reach the maximum age for it. Lol.
Thankfully God sent the couple to help me out. We stayed till 5pm and managed to get the header and map done. Guess there's nothing much to do other than the MCG stuff. I'll put the notice board aside for a week and focus on my media ministry.
But my precept is not doing that great because I think it is mainly procrastination and laziness. Man, I need to pray for forgiveness and stuff on it. I need God to teach me how to manage time so that I don't get caught up with what I'm supposed to do.
Yesterday's message Rev. S. actually said something like why hold on to unhappy life when God brought you out of it? I find it speaking directly to me because despite the painful life I had with "him" around, I tend to look back to the good things instead of the bad and keep praying for God to give it back to me. yes, it does sound dumb. My good female church friend said something like, "he could be the best amongst your ex, but probably he's the the least rotten one in them, which doesn't mean that he is the best mate you can get."
I guess since Friday I have this thought that I don't hold on so tight anymore, and it's actually a blessing from God that I realized probably I hold on so tight to him is because I'm afraid I'm lonely. I gave up all my 10-yo friendship with those who choose to live in an ungodly way, my family criticized my belief as a Christian, and I wasn't close to anyone in church other than "him". Fear, I guess, got the best of me. I'm so thankful I've decided to let him go and look for another godly mate. I'm also thankful that God allows my friendship to blossom in church.
Finally, I'm at peace with myself.
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