I was early for my last student hence as usual, I sat at the void deck waiting for time to pass.
Soon after, a young lady came and sat down, with a cigarette. I don't want to assume that it comes from her, hence I waited until I see the lighted cigarette from her fingers. That's when I became bold and tell her that it's illegal smoking at the void deck. She tried to reason saying that there's no sign saying it is illegal. I replied saying that the campaign was all over the news and tv. I even adds that if she thinks it's not illegal, I would like to take an opportunity to take her picture, send it to the police, and see who's right. I made a simple gesture of trying to activate my iPhone camera and while I was searching for the function, she called me a bitch and walked away. Trying to being polite, I said "okay" to acknowledge that she's leaving and I can cut my search for camera and "thank you" for her cooperation.
Poor lady. I suppose she doesn't know the impact she'd have gotten if she continues to smoke. I'm already fearing for every member's life in my family, resigning to the fact that everyone in my family may not make it past 60years old. Yes, I supposed I'll die earlier since I'm the second-hand smoker for three people at home and many more outside home. I wouldn't think that that lady will be thankful to me, but she indeed broke the law and may have to be fined. I can't imagine if she encounters someone who takes her picture sneakily and send it to the police. Besides, I do have the right to protect myself in public since I cannot protect myself from the place I live. I still pray that the lady would come to understand why such a life is not acknowledged by people; for God to reach out to her.
Monday, 30 January 2012
Awesome Voyage De La Vie and flower festival, 人日 and iPhone 4S
Blessed belated 人日！According to Chinese tradition, yesterday was everyone's birthday. I am officially 29years old, according to Chinese custom. We are regarded as 1year old the moment we're born. Unlike the westerners, Chinese do not celebrate individual's birthday. On contrary, they celebrate it every year together, which is the seventh day of the first month in lunar calendar. Sometimes I can't help but link it to bible, as God doesn't want us to exalt ourselves more than He is. Even in the Buddhist culture, celebrating birthday every year spells the shortage of life once you stop celebrating it (source: grandma and mum).
Anyway, yesterday Aixin and I went to Resort World Sentosa. Don't get me wrong: although I've been thinking about the transformers ride, we were not there for USS. I've gotten a pair of complimentary ticket that my daddy received while bringing a customer to one of the hotels there. Although the circus performance is good, it did not leave a lasting impression on me. Or rather, I felt that the show starter: a pair and a "ticket officer" who pretended to have some cute argument over the seating arrangement was more interesting.
Before going for the circus performance, Aixin and I went for the flower festival in sentosa. It was the last day yesterday but they have amazing flowers! It's such a wonderful place for wedding photos! Having wedding photos there on weekdays are good, because weekends are just too crowded.
I received a $80 voucher from Singtel. Condition is the date due will be the leap day. Meanwhile, I'll order the iPhone 4S and downgrade my plan so that I can enjoy the voucher. Excited to get my new phone. My phone has been lagging: signs of telling me it's old. I suppose I'll keep the phone I'll still keep the phone for my parents or brother to use it. After all, iPhone 3GS is still usable.
Anyway, yesterday Aixin and I went to Resort World Sentosa. Don't get me wrong: although I've been thinking about the transformers ride, we were not there for USS. I've gotten a pair of complimentary ticket that my daddy received while bringing a customer to one of the hotels there. Although the circus performance is good, it did not leave a lasting impression on me. Or rather, I felt that the show starter: a pair and a "ticket officer" who pretended to have some cute argument over the seating arrangement was more interesting.
Before going for the circus performance, Aixin and I went for the flower festival in sentosa. It was the last day yesterday but they have amazing flowers! It's such a wonderful place for wedding photos! Having wedding photos there on weekdays are good, because weekends are just too crowded.
I received a $80 voucher from Singtel. Condition is the date due will be the leap day. Meanwhile, I'll order the iPhone 4S and downgrade my plan so that I can enjoy the voucher. Excited to get my new phone. My phone has been lagging: signs of telling me it's old. I suppose I'll keep the phone I'll still keep the phone for my parents or brother to use it. After all, iPhone 3GS is still usable.
Friday, 27 January 2012
It's not the best of days
Sigh, I should just admit my poor time management. My eyes are so tired. I should go get a new pair of spectacles soon - something that doesn't slip from my nose bridge and ensure that my oily face will not contribute to the sliding of the spectacles. I'd just need to go back to YES optical shop soon.
My cough ain't exactly helping. I've been coughing for two weeks now; I just can't stop eating those goodies! Sigh. Not sure why they so nice now. For the past few years it wasn't nice to me at all. It wasn't even attractive. I believe I can only spell one thing: Ms Goh is old.
No matter how much I've rested, I know I've rested enough but after a few hours of teaching my sleepy eyes are commanding me to rest. I mean, how bad is it? I've decided not to work on computer yesterday and an intending not to do it today. Also, tomorrow I'll do some shopping and buy whatever should be bought: papers, printer ink, two presents and stationaries. Roaming around Funan (for free challenger papers and buying inks) and Bras Basah will be my choice tomorrow. No choice, my weekdays are packed with precept, study and scanning and printing of stuff.
Thank God this Sunday is pure relaxing day. Going for Sentosa's flower festival and the circus performance (all for free) are just pure exciting. ^^ happy! I hope after this week I'll place my heart that yearns for freedom down as I challenge myself for three months of hardship and perseverance. I must do all things right!
My cough ain't exactly helping. I've been coughing for two weeks now; I just can't stop eating those goodies! Sigh. Not sure why they so nice now. For the past few years it wasn't nice to me at all. It wasn't even attractive. I believe I can only spell one thing: Ms Goh is old.
No matter how much I've rested, I know I've rested enough but after a few hours of teaching my sleepy eyes are commanding me to rest. I mean, how bad is it? I've decided not to work on computer yesterday and an intending not to do it today. Also, tomorrow I'll do some shopping and buy whatever should be bought: papers, printer ink, two presents and stationaries. Roaming around Funan (for free challenger papers and buying inks) and Bras Basah will be my choice tomorrow. No choice, my weekdays are packed with precept, study and scanning and printing of stuff.
Thank God this Sunday is pure relaxing day. Going for Sentosa's flower festival and the circus performance (all for free) are just pure exciting. ^^ happy! I hope after this week I'll place my heart that yearns for freedom down as I challenge myself for three months of hardship and perseverance. I must do all things right!
Monday, 23 January 2012
Chinese New Year Day 1
Had spring cleaning since I got home from church. In order not to oversleep, I chose not to sleep on Saturday after reunion dinner at my grandparents' place. Oh well, it isn't that hard to keep myself awake: I'm going to finish Neverwinter Nights soon.
Tomorrow I'll prepare precept worksheet and attempt it while the rest gamble. I tried logging into my online lessons to do the basics but was welcomed with an expired profile notice. I've sent an email to the company handling this and hopefully they do something soon.
Anyway, I took great efforts to doll myself today, which includes a four hours manicure and pedicure at home while my family attempted to visit Chinatown (but faced failure because they could not even go in and shop). Either way, I stayed at home and luxuriously did my nails and slept once the two hours drying had passed. Today I managed to put on fake eyelashes (for the first time) with glue. My eyes look even now (the scar on my eyelid is hidden) and they look like normal pair of eyes.
As usual, I did the most out of the blue thing and took a picture. Not so bad, especially when I decided not to wear the cardigan and reveal my two-toned, flabby arms. Today I tried to help around in serving the guests. Reunion dinner I helped to place the almond goodies nicely in the container. I pray that I can do more everytime I visit relatives, so as to be humble and eager to serve.
Tomorrow I'll prepare precept worksheet and attempt it while the rest gamble. I tried logging into my online lessons to do the basics but was welcomed with an expired profile notice. I've sent an email to the company handling this and hopefully they do something soon.
Anyway, I took great efforts to doll myself today, which includes a four hours manicure and pedicure at home while my family attempted to visit Chinatown (but faced failure because they could not even go in and shop). Either way, I stayed at home and luxuriously did my nails and slept once the two hours drying had passed. Today I managed to put on fake eyelashes (for the first time) with glue. My eyes look even now (the scar on my eyelid is hidden) and they look like normal pair of eyes.
As usual, I did the most out of the blue thing and took a picture. Not so bad, especially when I decided not to wear the cardigan and reveal my two-toned, flabby arms. Today I tried to help around in serving the guests. Reunion dinner I helped to place the almond goodies nicely in the container. I pray that I can do more everytime I visit relatives, so as to be humble and eager to serve.
Sunday, 22 January 2012
Reunion dinner
I realized a lot of things today:
1. My brother is actually very smart. He is able to say all colours that were asked of him
2. My brother has good conversational skills. We spent the whole journey talking about nothing at all when travelling to my grandparents' house.
3. I feel kind of weird in my family. I sensed they feel the same too
4. My family is a singing family. Basically almost everyone has taken part in singing competition or performed on stage before. Yes, that includes me.
5. My brother is quite an entertainer. He makes everyone laughs with his Caucasian slang.
Dinner was superb. Auntie cooked beehoon, rice, curry chicken, traditional hainanese pig's trotter, fried calamari, fried fish cakes, spicy chicken (which tastes like pizza hut. Go buy CP brand spicy dumplets), and Yusheng. I love Yusheng man. Especially with salmon. This year they decided to go with abalone. Hopefully my 小姨 prepares the salmon Yusheng. ^^
Now my main point of Yusheng is to enjoy the niceness of it; not the prosperity or whatsoever. it does dawn on me that prosperity doesn't matter anymore. I'm just planning what kind of simple life I would like to have that revolves around God.
But you are to be perfect, even as your Father in heaven is perfect. (Matthew 5:48 NLT) "perfect means wanting nothing."
1. My brother is actually very smart. He is able to say all colours that were asked of him
2. My brother has good conversational skills. We spent the whole journey talking about nothing at all when travelling to my grandparents' house.
3. I feel kind of weird in my family. I sensed they feel the same too
4. My family is a singing family. Basically almost everyone has taken part in singing competition or performed on stage before. Yes, that includes me.
5. My brother is quite an entertainer. He makes everyone laughs with his Caucasian slang.
Dinner was superb. Auntie cooked beehoon, rice, curry chicken, traditional hainanese pig's trotter, fried calamari, fried fish cakes, spicy chicken (which tastes like pizza hut. Go buy CP brand spicy dumplets), and Yusheng. I love Yusheng man. Especially with salmon. This year they decided to go with abalone. Hopefully my 小姨 prepares the salmon Yusheng. ^^
Now my main point of Yusheng is to enjoy the niceness of it; not the prosperity or whatsoever. it does dawn on me that prosperity doesn't matter anymore. I'm just planning what kind of simple life I would like to have that revolves around God.
But you are to be perfect, even as your Father in heaven is perfect. (Matthew 5:48 NLT) "perfect means wanting nothing."
Wednesday, 18 January 2012
Starting to gear up
Today, I woke up late again. I set alarm at 7am, but woke up at 10am. Knowing that I'll be waking up late, I set an additional alarms at 9am. I took notice of the 9am instead of the 7am and it kind of show how tired I am. I quickly wash up and print whatever is needed for today. Headed to Emmanuel House to buy Colossians worksheets. Thankfully they still have it! Spoke to the staff at precept for a while and went to my first student happily. Two weeks of homework instead of one - I suppose it'll be a heavy topic too.
I thank God for improvement from my Thai student. Science is doing well, Math too, just need more help on English. Friday will be English all the way. Pray that everything will be alright.
Thankfully there's Chinese New Year. I can take the opportunity to chill at cafes on the first and second day of festive season just to rush my homeworks and teaching materials. I'll need to close chapter 2 of my RPG game - Neverwinter Nights. I'll continue chapter 4 after my assignments.
Saturday after teaching I need to do spring cleaning. Help mum a bit in the house. Not sure when is the reunion dinner, but I suppose I'm not the entertaining type so I'll bring my laptop there to work. Joelle needs to work hard, remember?
I miss drawing. I want to explore painting. I have so many things in life and yet I don't achieve them because I did not plan to. Right now, I'm planning to fulfill them one by one.
Everything is getting ready; everything is moving to what I thought they would.
I thank God for improvement from my Thai student. Science is doing well, Math too, just need more help on English. Friday will be English all the way. Pray that everything will be alright.
Thankfully there's Chinese New Year. I can take the opportunity to chill at cafes on the first and second day of festive season just to rush my homeworks and teaching materials. I'll need to close chapter 2 of my RPG game - Neverwinter Nights. I'll continue chapter 4 after my assignments.
Saturday after teaching I need to do spring cleaning. Help mum a bit in the house. Not sure when is the reunion dinner, but I suppose I'm not the entertaining type so I'll bring my laptop there to work. Joelle needs to work hard, remember?
I miss drawing. I want to explore painting. I have so many things in life and yet I don't achieve them because I did not plan to. Right now, I'm planning to fulfill them one by one.
Everything is getting ready; everything is moving to what I thought they would.
Tuesday, 17 January 2012
Hello, School.
I had the most happening days recently and I thought I should just save time by consolidating them into one entry while on my way home from school. Let's start from Saturday...
On Saturday I went to tutor my China boy. First lesson on Saturday and I'm thankful yet fretful about the progress it makes. Nevertheless, I make sure I do a good job ba, since after August he is able to read (a little from starfall.com). His conversational English is still bad.
Anyway, went for YAF election session and am still glad that president has been planning for someone to take over his position. I'll just continue to pray for him as it has always been a tough role. Come to think of it, I have about 7years before I become overage for YAF. We were encouraged to pray for EXCO position next year. I'm not too hopeful though, just praying real hard on how I can serve God. Been thinking of sending a proposal to the website and social network media leader about our problems and solutions but not sure how to start.
Dinner was wonderful because I did not pay for it. Elder John did and we were really grateful about it. Nice dinner with great fellowship. Since when did I sit down with them for a meal? I think it was October or November 2011. I'm surprised how time flies.
I had not been productive and effective in time management after that. Slept at 2am just to find out that I was late for dedication. You have no idea how much I prayed in the cab. My heart just sank when I received message saying dedication was over. :( still, without the oath and promise to serve God with all I have, I'll still do my best in serving Him, because I am born to do so.
I guess that time was a wake up call for me. I suddenly resumed my burning desire to know God better, unlike the last few weeks. I believe it was my lowest point in christian life because I have not been a good disciple. My January theme verse is "Make it your goal to live a quiet life, minding your own business and working with your hands, just as we instructed you before. Then people who are not Christians will respect the way you live, and you will not need to depend on others. (1 Thessalonians 4:11, 12 NLT)" Seriously, it's tough to work through this verse. The previous verse isn't that bad: "Search me, O God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends you,
and lead me along the path of everlasting life. (Psalm 139:23, 24 NLT)" I do notice that whatever I choose, God will test me according to the verse. Thankfully, with God's grace I managed to scrape through December verse, but January's verse is really bad. I'm starting to wonder if I want to extend it to February because I need the obedience and discipline to manage my life.
Speaking of which, I borrowed a book from church library entitled "Discovering The Joy of Obedience". This book is older than me, and was bought as a gift in 1981. It got me engaged in reading three chapters in an hour. It is a thin but interesting book. I've yet to finish my evangelism book. I find my spiritual growth is important now because of my backsliding. As i do not have any money for buying such books, I'm grateful there's a library to borrow it.
I went to Far East Plaza with a sister. Probably I should learn to say no next time because I ended up reaching home at 12mn. Thank God the express bus came immediately. Otherwise I'd have reached home at 12.30am. My Monday schedule starts at noon so it wasn't that bad. My eyes are back to the painful moments because of my excessive use of computer. Prayerfully I can change my spectacles by the end of the month. I've decided to go for operation this December. Hopefully I can go for mission trip on November (I miss the kids and friends at Mae Sariang). I just need to discuss with Gwyneth about the purpose of the trip and ask Jack if there's anything we can plan.
There's not much happening on Monday. Just a cancelled student when I was halfway walking to the bus stop to take a bus to her place. I developed cough and diarrhea yesterday and it has not cease today. I'm still trying to hold my tummy as I travel back home after course briefing.
Today I only have two students. I'm thankful for my P2 student who showed me her exercise book on English, so that I know what to do for my china boy. I went shopping a bit and then eyebrow plucking. The session really make me look more alert. I'm also thankful to God for letting me have a breather when my P4 student finally showed some improvement in word problem sums. You have no idea how many agonizing sessions I've spent just to help her grasp the foundation. Finally one method worked! Not model, not keywords but just asking her to list down what she's trying to find in each working statement. You have no idea how many times I've praised her today to encourage her to work towards it.
Just received a call from china boy's mum about adding another session. I'll have to discuss with my P2 girl to see if she's willing to change her timing to morning instead of night. Then I'll have a week day night and Saturday noon sessions and with him.
Today's trip to school was a bad one. Thankfully I went half an hour earlier. I made it just on time and they actually upgraded the headphone. Ive also gotten a new set of book, even though I have another set at home. Nonetheless the half an hour session was ok and I had better get started on the learning. Also, I need to buy the Colossians precept worksheets so that I can work on it too. This week will be the beginning of my busy months. April will be the final things for everything: debt and studies. Joelle just need to work hard. Pray for me ya?
Alright. My health is deteriorating. Cough is getting worse. Thankfully everything is in good order so far.
On Saturday I went to tutor my China boy. First lesson on Saturday and I'm thankful yet fretful about the progress it makes. Nevertheless, I make sure I do a good job ba, since after August he is able to read (a little from starfall.com). His conversational English is still bad.
Anyway, went for YAF election session and am still glad that president has been planning for someone to take over his position. I'll just continue to pray for him as it has always been a tough role. Come to think of it, I have about 7years before I become overage for YAF. We were encouraged to pray for EXCO position next year. I'm not too hopeful though, just praying real hard on how I can serve God. Been thinking of sending a proposal to the website and social network media leader about our problems and solutions but not sure how to start.
Dinner was wonderful because I did not pay for it. Elder John did and we were really grateful about it. Nice dinner with great fellowship. Since when did I sit down with them for a meal? I think it was October or November 2011. I'm surprised how time flies.
I had not been productive and effective in time management after that. Slept at 2am just to find out that I was late for dedication. You have no idea how much I prayed in the cab. My heart just sank when I received message saying dedication was over. :( still, without the oath and promise to serve God with all I have, I'll still do my best in serving Him, because I am born to do so.
I guess that time was a wake up call for me. I suddenly resumed my burning desire to know God better, unlike the last few weeks. I believe it was my lowest point in christian life because I have not been a good disciple. My January theme verse is "Make it your goal to live a quiet life, minding your own business and working with your hands, just as we instructed you before. Then people who are not Christians will respect the way you live, and you will not need to depend on others. (1 Thessalonians 4:11, 12 NLT)" Seriously, it's tough to work through this verse. The previous verse isn't that bad: "Search me, O God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends you,
and lead me along the path of everlasting life. (Psalm 139:23, 24 NLT)" I do notice that whatever I choose, God will test me according to the verse. Thankfully, with God's grace I managed to scrape through December verse, but January's verse is really bad. I'm starting to wonder if I want to extend it to February because I need the obedience and discipline to manage my life.
Speaking of which, I borrowed a book from church library entitled "Discovering The Joy of Obedience". This book is older than me, and was bought as a gift in 1981. It got me engaged in reading three chapters in an hour. It is a thin but interesting book. I've yet to finish my evangelism book. I find my spiritual growth is important now because of my backsliding. As i do not have any money for buying such books, I'm grateful there's a library to borrow it.
I went to Far East Plaza with a sister. Probably I should learn to say no next time because I ended up reaching home at 12mn. Thank God the express bus came immediately. Otherwise I'd have reached home at 12.30am. My Monday schedule starts at noon so it wasn't that bad. My eyes are back to the painful moments because of my excessive use of computer. Prayerfully I can change my spectacles by the end of the month. I've decided to go for operation this December. Hopefully I can go for mission trip on November (I miss the kids and friends at Mae Sariang). I just need to discuss with Gwyneth about the purpose of the trip and ask Jack if there's anything we can plan.
There's not much happening on Monday. Just a cancelled student when I was halfway walking to the bus stop to take a bus to her place. I developed cough and diarrhea yesterday and it has not cease today. I'm still trying to hold my tummy as I travel back home after course briefing.
Today I only have two students. I'm thankful for my P2 student who showed me her exercise book on English, so that I know what to do for my china boy. I went shopping a bit and then eyebrow plucking. The session really make me look more alert. I'm also thankful to God for letting me have a breather when my P4 student finally showed some improvement in word problem sums. You have no idea how many agonizing sessions I've spent just to help her grasp the foundation. Finally one method worked! Not model, not keywords but just asking her to list down what she's trying to find in each working statement. You have no idea how many times I've praised her today to encourage her to work towards it.
Just received a call from china boy's mum about adding another session. I'll have to discuss with my P2 girl to see if she's willing to change her timing to morning instead of night. Then I'll have a week day night and Saturday noon sessions and with him.
Today's trip to school was a bad one. Thankfully I went half an hour earlier. I made it just on time and they actually upgraded the headphone. Ive also gotten a new set of book, even though I have another set at home. Nonetheless the half an hour session was ok and I had better get started on the learning. Also, I need to buy the Colossians precept worksheets so that I can work on it too. This week will be the beginning of my busy months. April will be the final things for everything: debt and studies. Joelle just need to work hard. Pray for me ya?
Alright. My health is deteriorating. Cough is getting worse. Thankfully everything is in good order so far.
Wednesday, 11 January 2012
My game-corrupted life
I downloaded a really old game: neverwinter nights. Been playing since yesterday till this morning 6am, and then after I woke up at 11am, I continued playing it.
I was supposed to go for precept orientation today. After some thoughts, I've decided not to go and I shall go buy the booklet tomorrow at EH after my first student, since I have about 2.5hours of empty slot to my next student. It saves transport too.
I'm quite happy that the game I've downloaded kinda distract me from my negative emotions and mobile game obsession. Anyway, I still think God's word will help the most, but still am unwilling to submit to a total rejection of RPGs. Haiz, as much as I'm disappointed with myself, I just pray that one fine day everything that is bad and corruptive will disappear from my life. I guess have to wait till I've mature, and only God knows when that day will come.
I was supposed to go for precept orientation today. After some thoughts, I've decided not to go and I shall go buy the booklet tomorrow at EH after my first student, since I have about 2.5hours of empty slot to my next student. It saves transport too.
I'm quite happy that the game I've downloaded kinda distract me from my negative emotions and mobile game obsession. Anyway, I still think God's word will help the most, but still am unwilling to submit to a total rejection of RPGs. Haiz, as much as I'm disappointed with myself, I just pray that one fine day everything that is bad and corruptive will disappear from my life. I guess have to wait till I've mature, and only God knows when that day will come.
Tuesday, 10 January 2012
All because I did not teach at night
Yea. I'm still waiting for about 20minutes. Not a hard 20minutes, just puzzled why I wasn't informed about the cancellation of tuition.
Anyway, just below my student's place is a Christian family hosting a fellowship. From the sound of it, I can tell that the families are from China.
It's really comforting to witness such a thing. How do I know they're Christian? There's this auntie who kept saying, "你们都是基督徒＂ and the Chinese lady kept saying yes.
My student's mum just called to tell me that they were at opposite block and stuff and ignored my SMS because they didn't have the habit of replying (which they have been doing for the past year). Anyway, I thought that since they've arranged to have tuition on Tuesday, they should at least ensure that they're at home. That aside, I still graciously accepted their apology and didn't think much of it. It's probably God's will for me to rest since I've not been resting well, all thanks to my beloved pillows of 6 years.
I wonder if I were to be purposely angry, which I am not, will they still do it?
Ok, never mind. I'm still very puzzled by how quickly I can forgive others but not myself. I'll be home to do scanning. Tomorrow is a busy day because I'll have precept. ^^
oh well, it's just orientation. However, getting that worksheet and starts working right away does makes me happier. Busy is better than idle because I do not want to feel tired all the time.
I've uploaded my boredom into this entry. I hope it doesn't get any hate mails for it.
Anyway, just below my student's place is a Christian family hosting a fellowship. From the sound of it, I can tell that the families are from China.
It's really comforting to witness such a thing. How do I know they're Christian? There's this auntie who kept saying, "你们都是基督徒＂ and the Chinese lady kept saying yes.
My student's mum just called to tell me that they were at opposite block and stuff and ignored my SMS because they didn't have the habit of replying (which they have been doing for the past year). Anyway, I thought that since they've arranged to have tuition on Tuesday, they should at least ensure that they're at home. That aside, I still graciously accepted their apology and didn't think much of it. It's probably God's will for me to rest since I've not been resting well, all thanks to my beloved pillows of 6 years.
I wonder if I were to be purposely angry, which I am not, will they still do it?
Ok, never mind. I'm still very puzzled by how quickly I can forgive others but not myself. I'll be home to do scanning. Tomorrow is a busy day because I'll have precept. ^^
oh well, it's just orientation. However, getting that worksheet and starts working right away does makes me happier. Busy is better than idle because I do not want to feel tired all the time.
I've uploaded my boredom into this entry. I hope it doesn't get any hate mails for it.
Monday, 9 January 2012
random thoughts from a weary mind
I slept at 8.30pm yesterday and even after sleeping for 11hours, my mind hurts, eyes are swollen and vision is blurred. In my own desperation, I continued to work so that I can pay whatever I need to pay next month (especially my school fees).
I cant wait for Chinese New Year to end. Every year it has been a moody Chinese New Year. I pray really hard that after I settled everything this year, I'll be able to have a great time.
I've even thought of what I should do for Chinese New Year: go house visitation and stayed with my family. Once it's the last house visitation, I'll ask to leave the place after staying there an hour. I shall go home and scan all the books I can get my hands on. Then if I can borrow any DVD from anyone in church, I shall watch it after scanning. Hopefully I can rest early and the day 2 of CNY will end up almost the same way.
Anyway, I was doing my stuff at the void deck while waiting for my student to come home (to save transportation), this Korean-speaking guy came here, talked to his phone really loudly, and stared at me a number of times. There's once our eyes met, then he called another person and walked around the void deck for less than a minute, and left. I was sleepy but still feel a little {=.="}
Yesterday I was talking to Pastor while a sister went to apply tiger balm on her tummy because of stomachache. Then Pastor said, "I've heard a lot of good things about you." My immediate response was, "huh?" because I cannot think of myself as a good person. My sinful thoughts and painful life say it all. Thankfully, he did not go further than that after a chuckle.
I'm very, very tired. Suddenly, the tiredness of everything dawned upon me like the sunlight pouring its radiance at me. Unable to see myself; unable to see anything further. Can't move, can't think, can't do anything.
Anyway, MI:Ghost Protocol is nice. I'm kind of infatuated to Tom Cruise. Too bad he's married! :P Never mind. I'm just entertaining myself. Later.
I cant wait for Chinese New Year to end. Every year it has been a moody Chinese New Year. I pray really hard that after I settled everything this year, I'll be able to have a great time.
I've even thought of what I should do for Chinese New Year: go house visitation and stayed with my family. Once it's the last house visitation, I'll ask to leave the place after staying there an hour. I shall go home and scan all the books I can get my hands on. Then if I can borrow any DVD from anyone in church, I shall watch it after scanning. Hopefully I can rest early and the day 2 of CNY will end up almost the same way.
Anyway, I was doing my stuff at the void deck while waiting for my student to come home (to save transportation), this Korean-speaking guy came here, talked to his phone really loudly, and stared at me a number of times. There's once our eyes met, then he called another person and walked around the void deck for less than a minute, and left. I was sleepy but still feel a little {=.="}
Yesterday I was talking to Pastor while a sister went to apply tiger balm on her tummy because of stomachache. Then Pastor said, "I've heard a lot of good things about you." My immediate response was, "huh?" because I cannot think of myself as a good person. My sinful thoughts and painful life say it all. Thankfully, he did not go further than that after a chuckle.
I'm very, very tired. Suddenly, the tiredness of everything dawned upon me like the sunlight pouring its radiance at me. Unable to see myself; unable to see anything further. Can't move, can't think, can't do anything.
Anyway, MI:Ghost Protocol is nice. I'm kind of infatuated to Tom Cruise. Too bad he's married! :P Never mind. I'm just entertaining myself. Later.
Saturday, 7 January 2012
Cousin's blissful wedding
Today I had the most enjoyable wedding. Nothing much on the sentimental moments, but more on the entertainment side.
The beautifully presented photo videos makes whatever photo presentation I've seen so far to shame. Although some of the pictures and some captions are not shown clearly, I can see the effort that was put into it. Turns out, the video was managed by the groom's brother (if I did not remember wrongly).
I marveled by the wedding photos that they took (probably months before the wedding). The colours, the contrast, lightings and the album are just a wonderful combination. As a person who studied picture editing (but not so in depth), I learned to understand the beauty of these pictures.
Not only that, the video on this morning's gate crashing and tea ceremony is a classic. If I were my cousin, I'll probably reminisce it non-stop; probably put it in Facebook with the timeline function.
The "super-on" sisters and brothers they had are just crazily spontaneous. The yum-seng lasted really long: as if there was a battle between the sexes.
One word to describe the wedding: AWESOME! :)
The beautifully presented photo videos makes whatever photo presentation I've seen so far to shame. Although some of the pictures and some captions are not shown clearly, I can see the effort that was put into it. Turns out, the video was managed by the groom's brother (if I did not remember wrongly).
I marveled by the wedding photos that they took (probably months before the wedding). The colours, the contrast, lightings and the album are just a wonderful combination. As a person who studied picture editing (but not so in depth), I learned to understand the beauty of these pictures.
Not only that, the video on this morning's gate crashing and tea ceremony is a classic. If I were my cousin, I'll probably reminisce it non-stop; probably put it in Facebook with the timeline function.
The "super-on" sisters and brothers they had are just crazily spontaneous. The yum-seng lasted really long: as if there was a battle between the sexes.
One word to describe the wedding: AWESOME! :)
The "Courageous" Movie
Had a really brief YAF today. Went to cineleisure for "Courageous", the movie. There's a lot of people in the cinema: about 60% are from Galilee BP Church. How cool is that?!
Courageous is a really good movie. Humor, climax, action and a good biblical background of the story just piece up as a good movie. I also saw some Duggars in the movie.
I'm planning to get this as a Fathers' Day gift for my daddy when the DVD hits Singapore. Now I'm worrying which DVD I should get for my mum. Probably the Nativity story I bought for my student and his family last Christmas? :)
Anyway, I've been reflecting on being as a couple and as a single. I used to dislike being single because I'm lonely as an individual; so I do not want to feel lonely and always, and I really mean always, seek out a guy who wants to date me.
Unfortunately, most of the time I love as if I'll get married. Every relationship I gave my all, and as a result, nothing returns. I suppose the main reason to get attached is already wrong. Hence, the ending is always a bad one.
I'm always grateful for this gentle reminder whenever I feel alone. That I do not want to go in circles and most importantly, I am not alone because I still have God.
I gotta do something to bridge my relationship with my parents. I'm praying that I'll be able to have a mother-daughter time with mum. I wonder, what can I do that doesn't distract me from God and yet able to build kinship with my parents. Now trying to convert them, but truly want to get closer to them. I want to love them like how God loves me. Meanwhile, pray for a godly man. I know I'm not ready but handing the petition to God first and see how He works. :) Who knows, He may send someone who is ready to mold me to someone He wants. :)
Prayerfully, I hope he'll be like those men in the movie "Courageous".
Courageous is a really good movie. Humor, climax, action and a good biblical background of the story just piece up as a good movie. I also saw some Duggars in the movie.
I'm planning to get this as a Fathers' Day gift for my daddy when the DVD hits Singapore. Now I'm worrying which DVD I should get for my mum. Probably the Nativity story I bought for my student and his family last Christmas? :)
Anyway, I've been reflecting on being as a couple and as a single. I used to dislike being single because I'm lonely as an individual; so I do not want to feel lonely and always, and I really mean always, seek out a guy who wants to date me.
Unfortunately, most of the time I love as if I'll get married. Every relationship I gave my all, and as a result, nothing returns. I suppose the main reason to get attached is already wrong. Hence, the ending is always a bad one.
I'm always grateful for this gentle reminder whenever I feel alone. That I do not want to go in circles and most importantly, I am not alone because I still have God.
I gotta do something to bridge my relationship with my parents. I'm praying that I'll be able to have a mother-daughter time with mum. I wonder, what can I do that doesn't distract me from God and yet able to build kinship with my parents. Now trying to convert them, but truly want to get closer to them. I want to love them like how God loves me. Meanwhile, pray for a godly man. I know I'm not ready but handing the petition to God first and see how He works. :) Who knows, He may send someone who is ready to mold me to someone He wants. :)
Prayerfully, I hope he'll be like those men in the movie "Courageous".
Friday, 6 January 2012
Random negativity
I woke up feeling really bad: physically, emotionally and mentally. Thankfully spiritually isn't affected. I guess the money problems weigh me down again.
Having paid about $900 for my modules, it's no wonder I kept asking myself when will I get over it. $7000 do cornea transplant and an additional $2000 for laser seems so far-fetched, as if it may never happen.
Faith seems to be the hardest thing to obtain; seriously, that's all I have now.
Anyway, tomorrow is my cousin's big day. Then off to courageous movie recharge and finally to her wedding dinner. Crazy day tomorrow, but it's all worth it. Thank God that I do not need to pay for the ticket because YAF paid for it. I finally get to go to cinema and watch movie since October (a loner trip). ^^
Having paid about $900 for my modules, it's no wonder I kept asking myself when will I get over it. $7000 do cornea transplant and an additional $2000 for laser seems so far-fetched, as if it may never happen.
Faith seems to be the hardest thing to obtain; seriously, that's all I have now.
Anyway, tomorrow is my cousin's big day. Then off to courageous movie recharge and finally to her wedding dinner. Crazy day tomorrow, but it's all worth it. Thank God that I do not need to pay for the ticket because YAF paid for it. I finally get to go to cinema and watch movie since October (a loner trip). ^^
Thursday, 5 January 2012
Made it through the third day
Today is really short. I managed to get my run, which lasted 15minutes more. I also took shorter time to cover longer distance. Apparently warming up helps. :)
I'm amazed by how fast my body adjusts to the running routine. I'm currently planning to cover more area. On Monday I ran from St Hilda's to Tampines Sports Hall, then to mosque and finally to Tampines West Park. Today I ran near Spring Field Secondary, then to Tampines Central Community Complex, then to mosque, past Tampines Sports Hall, then past St Hilda's. After that, I walked past my house to the Tampines West Park and walked the whole park to calm down. Walked home after that and did stretching before going home. Although I would've failed my NAPFA with such a speed (5.8KM run and walk for 56 minutes), I'm thankful to know that I'm improving. :D
Alright, tomorrow I can wake up early, but I still want to maintain the sleep time. So I shall go wash dishes after a light meal (fish, pork and soup with vegetables and meat). Everyday is a great day! ^^
I'm amazed by how fast my body adjusts to the running routine. I'm currently planning to cover more area. On Monday I ran from St Hilda's to Tampines Sports Hall, then to mosque and finally to Tampines West Park. Today I ran near Spring Field Secondary, then to Tampines Central Community Complex, then to mosque, past Tampines Sports Hall, then past St Hilda's. After that, I walked past my house to the Tampines West Park and walked the whole park to calm down. Walked home after that and did stretching before going home. Although I would've failed my NAPFA with such a speed (5.8KM run and walk for 56 minutes), I'm thankful to know that I'm improving. :D
Alright, tomorrow I can wake up early, but I still want to maintain the sleep time. So I shall go wash dishes after a light meal (fish, pork and soup with vegetables and meat). Everyday is a great day! ^^
Wednesday, 4 January 2012
Random lyrics
I stood alone, alone in my dark room
I ponder 'bout my life, and other lives 'round me too
I knelt down, I ask Him what I can do
To help those helpless, guide them back to Him
What else I can do for Him
Love me, to love others
Lead me, to stay close to God
Help me, to live righteously
Teach me, to lead others too
Comfort me, when I am down
Convict me, when I am wrong
Light my path, when I am lost
Shine for You, to guide others too
I see a man, who can't quit his bad habits
I see a woman, who struggles with her work
I see a friend, who finds meaning in her life
They didn't know, how much God cares
How to let them know He cares
Love me, to love others
Lead me, to stay close to God
Help me, to live righteously
Teach me, to lead others too
Comfort me, when I am down
Convict me, when I am wrong
Light my path, when I am lost
Shine for You, to guide others too
I ponder 'bout my life, and other lives 'round me too
I knelt down, I ask Him what I can do
To help those helpless, guide them back to Him
What else I can do for Him
Love me, to love others
Lead me, to stay close to God
Help me, to live righteously
Teach me, to lead others too
Comfort me, when I am down
Convict me, when I am wrong
Light my path, when I am lost
Shine for You, to guide others too
I see a man, who can't quit his bad habits
I see a woman, who struggles with her work
I see a friend, who finds meaning in her life
They didn't know, how much God cares
How to let them know He cares
Love me, to love others
Lead me, to stay close to God
Help me, to live righteously
Teach me, to lead others too
Comfort me, when I am down
Convict me, when I am wrong
Light my path, when I am lost
Shine for You, to guide others too
The 3rd day of changed plan.
I failed miserably today. I couldn't sleep last night because I did not exercise (I reached home at 11.05pm and figured I could not sleep at 12mn). Instead, I watch TV till 2.30am, bathed and slept at 3am. Woke up at 11.30am, feeling miserably about the whole thing. Seriously, procrastination really kills time and well-being.
I'm gonna try again today since I end work at about 9pm. PRAY PRAY PRAY that I'll follow my schedule otherwise it won't work. Of course, adjustments have to be made to ensure that I don't feel overwhelming tired.
Speaking of tiredness, mum fainted in the toilet because of exhaustion. Sadly, nobody knew what exactly happened until she came out of toilet. My heart hurts so much and yet due to my inability to show piety and support, I can only offer cold comfort to my mum, tried to help her with chores, and pray that she will quit her job soon and my ability to give her hundreds of dollars for allowance. My circumstance tells me that I need to get over studies and work full-time. My motivation for family has always been strong. Just that I don't know how to express it, which needs a lot of work.
Speaking of expressing, dad took the initiative to bring me to my last student yesterday. I seized the opportunity to have a father-daughter talk with him. It turned out well. We soften our hearts and talked like family: about mother, about brother and things like that. Thank God for such opportunities. I just want to show that God did not take me away from them; He allowed me to be stronger and more sensible because I have another loving spiritual family that helped me this way. If they see it as a good thing, they'll be curious to see this new family I have and would want to be loving and a part of such family. I'm also thanking God for the book I borrowed from church library. It has been selfish on my side, and this book showed me why they're acting the way they are.
Having devotions back really helps in my christian life. I do notice that without devotions, it is hard to walk the christian walk. It'll be painful and scary, like no life in all. Having heed the Duggars' advise on having devotional in the morning helps, because the first thing you do in the morning is to talk to God. I'll usually have a prayer after devotions to state what I've learnt and what God wants to tell me. If in doubt, I'll highlight the verse in my iphone bible and ask when I get my hands on anyone who is more wise in knowing the word of God. I'm still looking forward to Precept next week! :D Colossians should be good, I hope! lol.
Faith and trust are all I can give God. However, He gives me more than that: love, comfort, acceptance, strength, discipline, providence and many more. Without them, I cannot be strong and I cannot tell the world how much God loves them. Although I love to pray with my family before meals, or when they are feeling down we can pray together but I find it hard to do so because that wall between my family and me is still there. Please pray for me as I find courage to ask if I can pray for them. :)
I'm gonna try again today since I end work at about 9pm. PRAY PRAY PRAY that I'll follow my schedule otherwise it won't work. Of course, adjustments have to be made to ensure that I don't feel overwhelming tired.
Speaking of tiredness, mum fainted in the toilet because of exhaustion. Sadly, nobody knew what exactly happened until she came out of toilet. My heart hurts so much and yet due to my inability to show piety and support, I can only offer cold comfort to my mum, tried to help her with chores, and pray that she will quit her job soon and my ability to give her hundreds of dollars for allowance. My circumstance tells me that I need to get over studies and work full-time. My motivation for family has always been strong. Just that I don't know how to express it, which needs a lot of work.
Speaking of expressing, dad took the initiative to bring me to my last student yesterday. I seized the opportunity to have a father-daughter talk with him. It turned out well. We soften our hearts and talked like family: about mother, about brother and things like that. Thank God for such opportunities. I just want to show that God did not take me away from them; He allowed me to be stronger and more sensible because I have another loving spiritual family that helped me this way. If they see it as a good thing, they'll be curious to see this new family I have and would want to be loving and a part of such family. I'm also thanking God for the book I borrowed from church library. It has been selfish on my side, and this book showed me why they're acting the way they are.
Having devotions back really helps in my christian life. I do notice that without devotions, it is hard to walk the christian walk. It'll be painful and scary, like no life in all. Having heed the Duggars' advise on having devotional in the morning helps, because the first thing you do in the morning is to talk to God. I'll usually have a prayer after devotions to state what I've learnt and what God wants to tell me. If in doubt, I'll highlight the verse in my iphone bible and ask when I get my hands on anyone who is more wise in knowing the word of God. I'm still looking forward to Precept next week! :D Colossians should be good, I hope! lol.
Faith and trust are all I can give God. However, He gives me more than that: love, comfort, acceptance, strength, discipline, providence and many more. Without them, I cannot be strong and I cannot tell the world how much God loves them. Although I love to pray with my family before meals, or when they are feeling down we can pray together but I find it hard to do so because that wall between my family and me is still there. Please pray for me as I find courage to ask if I can pray for them. :)
Tuesday, 3 January 2012
it's so weird?!
A guy asked a well-dressed woman (publicly and loudly in a bus) about her touching him.
-.-"
Seriously, in Singapore, you don't quite hear about guys being molested. Most Singapore women are quite full of themselves (I'm included).
Anyway, the woman replied that this guy tried to cut her queue when boarding the bus. Case closed because he kept quiet.
I'm not sure about other countries. So why would women here touch men? It would not speak logically when this well-dressed woman would touch someone who is not a Caucasian or a Singapore hunk. Perhaps I'm being bias to these men, but seriously, in my narrow-mindedness I cannot think of an extremely good reason for a woman to touch a man here.
In fact, men here consider flattered if a woman wants to touch him. Maybe not all are like this, but I don't recall any man, like the one I just saw, being so up front to blurt out, "why did you touch me?!"
Probably Singaporeans prefer to be discreet about this matter, especially if it'll create topic for people to post in Facebook or even, like me, blog about it.
It is still something I am unable to comprehend. It's probably culture but it's still weird. :)
-.-"
Seriously, in Singapore, you don't quite hear about guys being molested. Most Singapore women are quite full of themselves (I'm included).
Anyway, the woman replied that this guy tried to cut her queue when boarding the bus. Case closed because he kept quiet.
I'm not sure about other countries. So why would women here touch men? It would not speak logically when this well-dressed woman would touch someone who is not a Caucasian or a Singapore hunk. Perhaps I'm being bias to these men, but seriously, in my narrow-mindedness I cannot think of an extremely good reason for a woman to touch a man here.
In fact, men here consider flattered if a woman wants to touch him. Maybe not all are like this, but I don't recall any man, like the one I just saw, being so up front to blurt out, "why did you touch me?!"
Probably Singaporeans prefer to be discreet about this matter, especially if it'll create topic for people to post in Facebook or even, like me, blog about it.
It is still something I am unable to comprehend. It's probably culture but it's still weird. :)
The first day of a changed plan
Today is my second day for following the plan I made yesterday.
Unfortunately, I failed to wake up on time today and was two hours late.
Yesterday was good. I ran from home to St Hilda's, then to sports hall, past the mosque, to the park near my house, and walked around the park to calm myself down before walking home. I took about 45mins in all, and was happy that it happened.
Today I'm going to run again. And hopefully increase a little time each day.
I've also paid my school fees. It's so painful. I shall stop harping on the fact and make a difference now. :)
Been reading "Trouble With Parents" borrowed from Galilee Church Library. This really old book helped me understand my parents better. Now is how do I break my own language barrier and be friendly to them.
Anyway, embrace what I've planned first. :)
Unfortunately, I failed to wake up on time today and was two hours late.
Yesterday was good. I ran from home to St Hilda's, then to sports hall, past the mosque, to the park near my house, and walked around the park to calm myself down before walking home. I took about 45mins in all, and was happy that it happened.
Today I'm going to run again. And hopefully increase a little time each day.
I've also paid my school fees. It's so painful. I shall stop harping on the fact and make a difference now. :)
Been reading "Trouble With Parents" borrowed from Galilee Church Library. This really old book helped me understand my parents better. Now is how do I break my own language barrier and be friendly to them.
Anyway, embrace what I've planned first. :)
Monday, 2 January 2012
To work towards a fruitful year
I was planning for my financial stuff and schedule so that I can have a precise and detailed schedule to follow. Indeed, with time planned, you'll see a lot of time is wasted when you do not follow the plan.
I notice my problem is that I know I need to do something and yet decided not to do it because there's no strict restriction on whether to do it or not. This will create a lot of student's syndrome (doing things at the last minute). I pray that the timetable will ensure that I'll follow it obediently.
I'm quite amazed that I actually have 5hours of devotional time for God. That I can use it on precept homework or even do scripture memory if I take lesser time to complete the homework. Bottom line, I just want to grow more spiritually.
Now that I've settled the planning, I do not give time for unnecessary thoughts. I can also focus on my studies (which I set aside 5hours per week).
I even have 5hours of exercise time at night. This will make sure that I am physically (exercise) and mentally (work) tired before I go to bed. Sleeping soundly and have a healthy lifestyle is something I wanna work on too.
Finally, I managed to have the same wake-up-time and number of hours to rest everyday. This will help ensure that I obtain 7hours of sleep everyday. Good sleeping habits is also important in healthy lifestyle.
I've yet to plan my food consumption while traveling. I've decided to take small meals every time I travel. Which means food for every 1.5 to 2 hours. I'm looking for salad or something similar. Just tiny, healthy and releases energy bites that can keep me going for every two hours. If parents give desserts, then I will stop consuming anything for the next 3hours. I pray that it'll help in my lifestyle.
Anyway, I've just started working on it. Have yet to buy anything for my meals. Prayerfully, I hope that I'll stick to it and be amazed by the results. :)
I notice my problem is that I know I need to do something and yet decided not to do it because there's no strict restriction on whether to do it or not. This will create a lot of student's syndrome (doing things at the last minute). I pray that the timetable will ensure that I'll follow it obediently.
I'm quite amazed that I actually have 5hours of devotional time for God. That I can use it on precept homework or even do scripture memory if I take lesser time to complete the homework. Bottom line, I just want to grow more spiritually.
Now that I've settled the planning, I do not give time for unnecessary thoughts. I can also focus on my studies (which I set aside 5hours per week).
I even have 5hours of exercise time at night. This will make sure that I am physically (exercise) and mentally (work) tired before I go to bed. Sleeping soundly and have a healthy lifestyle is something I wanna work on too.
Finally, I managed to have the same wake-up-time and number of hours to rest everyday. This will help ensure that I obtain 7hours of sleep everyday. Good sleeping habits is also important in healthy lifestyle.
I've yet to plan my food consumption while traveling. I've decided to take small meals every time I travel. Which means food for every 1.5 to 2 hours. I'm looking for salad or something similar. Just tiny, healthy and releases energy bites that can keep me going for every two hours. If parents give desserts, then I will stop consuming anything for the next 3hours. I pray that it'll help in my lifestyle.
Anyway, I've just started working on it. Have yet to buy anything for my meals. Prayerfully, I hope that I'll stick to it and be amazed by the results. :)
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